My House, my home...

So it is 2011 and I sit in the kitchen amidst a million boxes, the sun pouring in, my first cup of coffee and a head full of dreams.My dog is whining at the porch door, my cat is on the back of my chair. Oftentimes, there are two yearly points that people will stop and assess their life: New Year's  being the obvious one and then September when the kids go back to school. But, as par for the course of my unusual life, I don't stop on those two points, in fact, I don't think I ever ponder at those two points. Rather it is moments like these when I think, when I ponder.

This year has been full of a number of things, some good, mostly bad. It started off with my being falsely accused of embezzlement. That particular episode started at the end of last year and rung in my new year. Not a great note to start on. This lasted  a few months and ended with a severing of relationships as a result.

Next came my one vacation in 6 going on 7 years. It was a mini weekend escape. It was a time I remember with fondness. Upon arriving back home, I discovered that we had been robbed and stripped of nearly everything of value. This was followed by an assault and attempted robbery on my eldest son. The court case for this is still pending.

Summer was somewhat uneventful. I gave my daughter a brilliant 13th birthday. August was marked by a human rights tribunal complaint due to discrimination because I have children. That is still under investigation.

Then September hit and so did the Gang Task Force Invasion. You can read about that here. This was followed by more police involvement, another robbery. I believe I counted about 10 traumatic events in 20 days. And thus the more intentional search for a house ( which we found).

And then we had puppies and I had to paint and clean one house, while packing and cleaning the other house. And then we moved.

So here I sit, among unopened, and opened boxes, in a house that is partially painted and partially cleaned. And apart from being terribly sleepy, I think I am content (unless that's just the sleepiness kicking in.)

And I ponder. And dream for the good things in this house. For you see this house is already something of a dream. No, I do not own it. I wish I did. But it has many things I've dreamed of. I grew up with a wood burning fireplace. Here there are now banned unless you have a house with one in it already. And now? Well, I have two! I have a large master bedroom with two closets and a half bath ensuite. More things I have wished for. I have a house with lots of windows so the sun can get in everywhere. The front of the house faces east, the back west. I have enough bedrooms for the kids and a great rec/games room. I have a big back yard. I have a wrap around deck for summer barbeques. I also have an unfinished room that I hope to turn into an office. I have a house, but more importantly I have a home.I have a park right next to me.

So as I sit this morning and looik at the mountains outside, I ponder and I wish. I wish for many things in this house. I hope to be remarried. I hope to hear the pitter patter of baby feet once again. But most of all, I wish for peace and safety for me and my kids.

My little guy looked up at me as he drowsily fell asleep and said to me two things: I trust this house Mommy, I trust it because I slept it in and it was good. And then he said, Thank you Mommy for getting us a house that is safe....